Let's get to it...
1. "SMVBOT": A match made in Heaven.
Ever heard of the term "a marriage between companies"? Well, saying "goodbye" to our irresistible French lovers over at STEAMBOT STUDIOS, was just a little too much for us to handle. So much so that, like good families, we arranged for our dear, sweet little Matjosh (seen below bearing a striking resemblance to Abraham Lincoln: Vampire Hunter!) to marry Steambot's wonderful resident hippie, that is Seb Larroude. What?! We were in San Francisco after all!
The ceremony was beautiful. We drank, we laughed and the happy couple left for their honeymoon. This is what happens when like minded people get together! Just wait until we start reproducing...
2. "ELECTRONIC CIGARETTES": Douche bag alert!
Ever seen those people smoking "E-Cigarettes"?!?! You know the ones we're talking about. Those smug little fuckers you see at restaurants, bus stops and on planes that "light up" their LED pens like c*nts, with that pedantic look on their faces like they're the lucky ones who can "smoke" when others can't and are stuck in the belief that they're actually going to quit smoking!
Well, you can imagine Emily's horror when her dear colleague (and now ex-friend) pulled one these "things" out in their hotel room and charged it up!! Here's how it went down:
Emily: What. The. Fuck dude!!
E: You're a douche!Y: Just try it!
(Emily takes a drag and feels something resembling fiberglass going down her throat, mixed with some kind of melon flavour. Chokes uncontrollably for 5mins.)
E: WHATHEFUCK GUY!!?!
Y: It's liquid smoke (*smug d-bag look*). Don't like the flavour? It's Watermelon. I also have Vanilla and Mint.
E: WHAT!?! Why wouldn't you at least get "Smoke" flavour?!
Y: (Laughing)They didn't have it left.
E: You're a gay. I'm telling your wife and suffocating you in your sleep!